[This is a backup. The current version is at http://joel-rees-about-sex.blogspot.com/2016/04/economics-101-novel-ch31a-reality.html and I assume youll prefer to read that.
(I recognized pretty quickly that Karel had left some important things unsaid, and you'll find those things on that page, not here.)]
(The story starts here: http://free-is-not-free.blogspot.jp/2016/03/economics-101-novel-ch00.html.
The previous chapter is here: http://free-is-not-free.blogspot.com/2016/04/economics-101-novel-ch30-fear-at-night.html If you missed that, there will be some discontinuity here, so you'll probably want to go back and read it.)
This
chapter contains sexually explicit material. Nothing to get too excited
about, Bobbie and Karel aren't having sex or anything like that, but I
don't want people who aren't interested in reading their discussion of
important sexual matters stumbling on it by accident. You may prefer to read the modest version, instead.
The modest version of the chapter is here: http://free-is-not-free.blogspot.com/2016/04/economics-101-novel-ch31-reality.html.
Karel
leaned forward as if in pain, hands forming fists over his knees,
suppressing a groan. He didn't seem quite able to talk, seemed to be
holding his breath.
"What's wrong?" Bobbie was not sure
what to do. She moved closer to him and massaged his back, and felt his
body shudder. Then she remembered some of her experiences as a nurse,
and the light came on in her mind.
"Oh, dear. That was not nice of me, was it?"
"Ah,
... " Her words, and maybe her hand on his back, too, seemed to have a
calming influence, and the fear and confusion in Karel's face faded and
he
started to breathe again. "No, it's okay." He took another breath. "Two
more weeks. Then you can kiss me when I'm asleep all you want." He
winced, and breathed deeply once more and groaned softly and shivered,
rocking back and forth, holding his legs below his knees.
"Are you gonna be OK?"
"Uhm, yeah, I think so. Gonna have to wash my underwear, though."
"Oh.
Sorry about that." She felt awkward, knowing that the apology was, at
the same time, both not enough and too much. "Can I do something to
help?"
Karel chuckled. "You just did." Then he relaxed and lay on the ground laughing, or maybe sobbing.
And both of them were praying in their hearts for direction from God.
"Now what?"
"Good question."
"Ehrm, does this mean, ..."
"Mean, ...?"
"Mean we ..., I don't know what I mean. Do you know what I mean?"
Karel sat back up. "Did you intend to open my valves?"
"Ick. No!"
"Then
you have not sinned, my daughter," he said, imitating a father
confessor he had seen in a movie. (Mormon bishops are not father confessors, and would generally not
use such phrasing. The Mormon approach to confessing is a little different, as you can see.)
"You're joking, and I'm a little scared."
"Well, what did you intend by kissing me?" Karel asked with mock strictness, trying to lighten the mood. Then he grinned.
And Bobbie relaxed, too. "I
had a kind of an odd dream, and when I woke up, you were talking in
your sleep. So I came around to check on you, and, well, you just looked
so sweet and you were mumbling something that sounded like you
were
saying you love me, and I was feeling a little strange because of the
dream," and Bobbie paused for a breath, "and I just acted on impulse."
"I don't think I see anything wrong with that. What was your dream about?"
"Oh. You remember the argument we had with Dan and Kristie in the cafeteria?"
"Dan. Kristie. When
they told us how unfair it was of us to be dating other people when we
were planning to do the research project together, even though we
weren't thinking of ourselves as romantically together?"
"Yeah. That one. When they tried to argue that the unfairness meant we should just give up the research project."
"And
then, instead, we both just admitted we guessed we'd been dating them
too long. Boy were they upset. Not that I blame them, really. We had
been dating them too long. And they started
dating each other after that, didn't they."
"Yeah, they did. I got a wedding announcement from them about a month ago."
"You did? Wonder why I didn't."
"It
came addressed to me, but it had both our names on it. Sort of. 'Bobbie and
Karel Pratt.' I didn't want to show it to you at the time."
Karel burst out laughing, and Bobbie joined him, their laughter echoing across the moonlit island.
When
their amusement subsided, Bobbie continued. "It was like that time, but
how
it might have been if everything that has happened in the last four
months, including Wycliffe's kidnapping us, were just a long and
detailed, continuing dream we had both had separately, together,
to warn us to get married before we came."
"Really? Interesting."
"And
I was dreaming it in the omniscient point of view. Pure Harlequin
Romance stuff. You come in, dodge their questions, tell me you're having
nightmares about being alone with me on an uncharted island. And I know
what you mean, but I'm scared to admit it, so I quibble about you
finding my
company unpleasant. And you come just right out and tell me it's rather
the opposite. And I say that, if we are going to be kidnapped, we
should do something to avoid the nightmare. And you realize you
hadn't mentioned the being kidnapped, so you know I must be having the
same
dreams as you. And Dan and Kristie have no idea what we are
talking about, of course. And they are a little over the top with their
attempts to defend their territory. And you and I walk off together to
talk about making sure we
would not be single."
"Sounds surreal, alright."
"When
I woke up, I
wasn't sure where I was at first. The dream had left something empty in me, but
that
emptiness went away as I recognized the stars and smells and sounds of
the island at night. Even the hard ground was reassuring, but I suddenly wanted to hear your voice. I listened
for you, and I guess I was going to crawl out to make sure you were
there anyway, when I heard you talking in your sleep."
"Oh. And then I looked cute in my sleep and ...?"
"and I wanted just a little more reassurance that this is all real."
"Wow. So. You think you're happy here?"
"I
don't think I'd be happy if this were taken away from us." Bobbie's
face crinkled into a strangely shy smile. "What was your dream?"
"It isn't obvious?"
"Why would it be obvious?"
"Oh, well, we were arguing about something inconsequential, and I kept trying to tell you I love you. I love you, by the way."
"It's nice to hear. I love you, too. What were we arguing about?"
Karel winced and tilted his head as if he wanted to dodge that question. "Do you really want to know?"
"I told you what I dreamed."
"We had some disagreement about getting married. I'm not sure what it was. Maybe it was about the marriage license."
"Have we ever really argued? Oh. Yeah. Never mind. It's easy to forget. That was all?"
"You, uh, said you didn't want to wait, and started taking your clothes off, and I was trying to stop you."
"EW! YUCK!"
"See. Sometimes it's better not to know things."
"Well, maybe not so yuck." Bobbie wondered whether Karel could see her blushing in the moonlight.
"Well, if you're going to dream about a woman taking her clothes off,
I'd rather it be about me."
"Erm, I'm glad you're not offended."
"Dreams
shouldn't be taken literally. Are you blushing? It looks like you're
blushing, but I can't really tell in the moonlight."
"Yeah. I'm sure I'm blushing."
"Me, too. Well, should we go wash your underwear?"
"We? Together?"
"Are you forgetting the buddy system?"
"Oh. Well, we could wait for our morning swim."
"Won't it come out cleaner if you wash it now?"
"Probably. I guess we can go for a midnight swim."
And
they both stood up and started walking toward the beach, but then
Bobbie stopped. "Wait. This isn't going to work very well."
"Oh.
Yeah. We aren't married yet. We can't go skinny-dipping together at
midnight just yet. Otherwise, why would I have been arguing with you in
my dream?"
And they both started laughing again and went back to the tent to change to their swimming suits.
They continued talking as they walked down to the beach, Karel carrying his soiled clothes.
"Will that always happen when I kiss you in your sleep?"
"Oh, no. I've just been, well, sort of practicing my endurance."
Bobbie gave him a quizzical look.
"We've talked before about my reasons for not always having a temple recommend before, ..."
"Yeah.
You've tended to interpret the law of chastity as including a ban
against masturbation. Your current bishop back home seemed to agree with
you, and my bishop seemed to think he should call your bishop and ask
why, but, at the time, we were still not admitting we were interested in
each other, so he didn't."
Back
around the 1960s or so, there seemed to be a bit of disagreement among
the leadership of the Church on this point. Some people think there
still is. For those who might have questions on the subject, I suggest
discussion with your nearest bishop. Other than to say we are neither
Pharisees nor hedonists, it is not my place to state Church policy on
the subject.
"Well, I haven't masturbated since a little bit after I broke up with Kristie. Wait. That doesn't sound right."
"I
know Kristie, and she is a sweet girl, but she was too physical with
you. And I told her so, but she wouldn't listen. It's funny, but I don't
think she was that way with Dan, at least not while we were there."
"I
always thought that she and Dan had better chemistry. She seemed not to
be trying to prove herself all the time the way she was with me."
"Did you go home after your dates with Kristie and get relief?"
"Ouch. That's a personal question. But, no, she wasn't that physical with me, even when we were alone."
"That's nice to know."
"The fluids build up anyway. And they have to be released every now and then."
"And we've talked about this before, and I've offered my opinion as a nurse."
"And some of the leaders of the Church say that the only legitimate way for the release to occur is nocturnal emission."
"Yeah, and we've talked about that, too."
At this point, they had waded into the water up to their waists, and Karel started to wash his underwear and trousers.
"And that was what I interrupted when I kissed you. So it was just a matter of bad timing?"
"Yeah. But if you make a practice of kissing me in my sleep, the fluids are likely to build up faster."
"Of course. I really was not thinking clearly."
"Middle
of the night, strange dreams, and this ambiguous situation, it's hard
to keep a clear head. For both of us. Okay, Turn around."
"Hmm? Oh. Yeah."
And Karel took off his trunks while Bobbie's back was turned and bathed himself in the salt water.
"So,
anyway, you're worried about whether we have ruined our purpose in
waiting until we have the marriage license to actually get married
physically?"
"Nope. Now I think I understand better why we should wait."
And Karel was finished, and they went back to camp and went back to bed under the stars, with the tent between them.
"Stupid ambiguities."
"Good night Karel. Sweet dreams."
"Good night, Bobbie. And thank you for being you. I can't imagine why we ever thought we would not like each other."
(The link to the next chapter will be here when it's ready.)
(The chapter index is here: http://joel-rees-economics.blogspot.jp/2016/04/economics-101-novel-index.html)
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